Nuclear Blasts and Feeling Philosophical (Pull Up Your Bootstraps, Time To Wade Through It)

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This morning is particularly uneventful, aside from another poop adventure with Emma. (This whole attempted-pottytraining-failing-miserably-with-the-pullups deal is starting to wear…) I left the girls with Allen and headed up to work with Ava and cookies, only to find the stomach bug has been passing around. I backed out slowly, touched nothing, got close to no one, and came home, promptly washing my hands, changing my clothes, and THEN picked Ava up. I felt like I had just survived a nuclear blast. Lets hope that did the trick…

Now, for the philosophy! I have been wondering lately, and thinking through all the things society says to Mothers today. Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but I’ve gotten the distinct impression that unless you have a job, and do something “worthwhile” outside of your home, just being a mother isn’t enough these days. This mindset is a struggle for me while I’m home on maternity leave. While I don’t believe that, per se, it is something I’ve heard, felt, seen, experienced in our postmodern culture. So, as I spend my days writing on this blog about nothing but laundry, dishes, poop, and exchanges with people shorter than 3 ft. I struggle with believing that what I write is meaningful, important, or useful. I, myself, knowing better, tell myself every day that what I do all day IS worthwhile, because deep down, I wonder. I feel isolated, with only my children for company and accomplishment. I question my worth when the bright spot in my day is a shower, or a grocery store run. I love the things I see, hear, experience each day. Enough to wish I could be one of those stay at home Moms. But, I know that I have an obligation to my job, my mortgage company, and my children’s bellies. I just don’t understand this cultural need to reject motherhood as silly, and parenthood as a solely fulfilling pursuit. And I don’t understand my lack of faith in it myself during maternity leave. I feel like I MUST be a subpar mother because even I think I could be doing something better with my life, and yet, I wanna stick around, and would if I could.
All in all, the choice isn’t mine, I will be going back to work, I can’t be a stay at home Mom, I salute those who are, and I will continue to struggle with the worth of my societal contributions during my maternity leave. March 1st comes way too fast…

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About measureofagift

I am a mother of a growing group of sweet kids. We laugh, we cry, and we grow together in Christ. Every day is a new adventure. I love chocolate, sticky kisses, quirky smiles, and funny qoutables my kids come up with. :) Belly giggles, snuggling, and homeschooling round out the list of loves. Not every day is easy, but every day IS a beautiful gift. Our life as a family is slowly changing and growing as a result of a renewed interest in God's Word. His influence has been a slow process of sanctification, and this blog is evidence of it. Past posts, and current posts have changed in tone and goal, and are a testimony of all that has changed in our lives. <3 "Now, All glory to God who is able through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we could ask or think." Eph 3:20

7 responses »

  1. Liz, you’re a rockstar! You are not sitting at home eating bon-bons and watching soaps. You have two very active little ones and a new baby. I think mothers (or fathers) who choose to stay home to raise their children should get some type of payment from the government. Not a million dollars, but maybe minimum wage… just enough to get by. That would create millions of jobs and give parents a chance to raise their own kids.

  2. Thanks Rachel! You’re pretty awesome yourself Mama! I’m already dreading the return to work… It’ll be a tough day. text me if you need to talk your first day back. I always struggle with worry on that day. I’m so preoccupied I might as well not be there…

  3. I hear you, Liz. I think that moms are given these messages all the time. It’s really just another phase in a long standing tradition of devaluing women’s work. It’s really an outrage that you can list all those millions of skills that you are required to have/learn when you have kids on a resume. However, I think your blog can definitely be a way of counteracting this: through these little stories you tell about “laundry, dishes, poop, and exchanges with people shorter than 3ft,” I think you really get at some much bigger truths. I really do.

    ~Allie Cav.

  4. P.S. Funny thing is Allie, what I do at home is really not that far from what I do at work, teaching young children. And yet I STILL struggle with these ideas and this pressure that staying at home is not worthwhile.

  5. I heard the same kind of meaningless babble floating around when I was the stay at home mom. One of the Kennedy senators even had the gall to say that stay at home mom’s were not productive members of society! GET REAL! Now that all of the kids are grown, I am still a stay at home mom (and grand-mom.) Don and I made the decision years ago that I would be available for our adult children. So, after a brief flirtation with the working world, here I am. Funny thing is, I hear all these women saying to my face, “Wow! I WISH I could stay home and raise my kids.” Then some other comment comes up, like the one from whichever Kennedy that was. Do you see the incongruity here? What’s up with that????

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